Lumosity is bullshit

Lumosity. That annoying commercial that features 20-somethings bragging about how good their brains feel because they’re playing a fucked up game of frogger.

This “neuroplasticity” is not real. There is no “plasticyness” to your brain. It’s wet and soft like a gross sponge. A three-pound gross sponge. Neurons “talk” to each other and give you the illusion of control, independence, and immortality. These are characteristics which I think are perfectly suited to a life form that will die.

The people who created Lumosity do not understand what it is like to be a parent. They do not understand what it is like to hold down a job, try to figure out a way to pay for college and braces while trying to encourage their children to go to college so that they are in a slightly better position than you when they are your age.

The people who created Lumosity are assholes that don’t understand the value of just shutting-the-fuck-down for a weekend. Hell, for five minutes! Go-Go-Go-Go! Everything is about them going! Jesus, man. Chill out for a minute and just rest. Enjoy the scenery. Watch a movie that makes you cry. Watch a child enjoy the ignorance of bliss of this fast, rushing life for Christ’s sake.

Look, I’m excited about your excitement. Really! I used to have it once. Then reality set in and I realized, just like my parents told me, it’s not all about me. I’m a piece of the puzzle. Assuming there’s a puzzle, of course.

All you single, childless people that are so busy doing and hoping everything… keep those things in mind, but be humble and accept that your fate is the dust. Don’t even assume about the afterlife. Just look at yesterday and today. Know that these are the only things you have. Tomorrow is just a hope. A bold assumption.

Relax a little.

Your bones

Your bones curled up
so small and sweet

Your clothes folded up
so small and neat

Your skull
cradled 
in my arms

Your face is lost
to all of harm

It comes and goes 
for one and all 
today we stand
tomorrow we fall

Young and old
strong and weak
the end is what
we all must wreak

Universe Shmuniverse

The Universe is not sending you a message. It’s not looking out for you. It’s not trying to make things okay for you.

If you’re so arrogant to think that the universe cares more about your situation than the mom who has cancer, or the baby that’s dying, or the toddler starving to death, then you’re an arrogant fuck that has no idea of the world around you. 

The universe does not care about you. You come, you go. For some weird reason, you’re aware of it. You won an interstellar lottery living in a 1st or 2nd world country. Good for you.

All you are doing is assigning meaning to where there is none. That’s it. No thing is talking to you. No one is trying to send you a message. You think Jesus only cares about white people.

Now get off your high horse and recognize where you stand. You stand on a piece of silica or carbon. An element which ultimately floats on a ball of magma. Which ultimately is forced to the core of a ball that just happens to be in a good place in space, around a just right star.

Way to go, Goldilocks. That bear’s gonna eat the meat off your bones.